Tuesday, October 5, 2010

11:47 10/5/10

Still doing really well, Its last day of quarter end so there is plenty of work to keep me busy.  Havent thought much about it today...no panic attacks.... I think with the huge workload and my "moment" this morning I am able to stay calm and distracted....still no call from police......anyone surprised at this??
I did have time to research more laws and old cases.....I guess thats all I can do now, study legal precedent and come strong with a case.  I know I was raped, I know its on me to prove it.....good thing I love research...


It's 1:08-  I was doing fine, and mentally I feel ok.....but the shaking in my hands is back.  Strange feeling....starting to get really tired, starting not to care again.  Called the counselor, left a message
No word from police

Its 1:24- Overwhelming feeling of sadness...I feel like balling my eyes out....still shaking....feeling nauseous...WTF.... out of nowhere

1:54-  I just broke down and started crying for no reason at all...my best friend had to close the door so I could ball my eyes out-  back to the  ativan i guess... back to work. i feel beyond stupid - no phone calls yet

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